Days of Change

The Gay Right | April 5, 2015

One of the things that people seem to believe is that groups that want more acceptance into society make themselves known, draw the attention of important people, get into the media and eventually change the attitudes of people. This is not the case. In the case of Blacks and gays and women, the government first institutionalized discrimination, then eliminated those laws while taking credit for their wisdom. The media are worse. There was a time when integrating Blacks into television was cool and counter cultural. You saw mixed race programming everywhere in the 1970’s. Then it got boring and we went back to segregated TV. Now the Black characters on TV are often tokens and act the same as a White character. Gay characters can be gay but they can’t act too gay for fear of being stereotypes.

When I see the controversy over people being sued over their right to refuse service, I am reminded of the civil union discussion. The argument by gays was that they only wanted a civil union so they could claim legal spousal rights and have some government acknowledgement of their non-legal marriages. That was a total lie. The civil union was simply a ploy to fool those with some trepidation. No one was fooled. In fact, the “ignorant” people who said civil unions would lead to gay marriage were exactly right.

The last time government should have been involved in gay relationships is when stupid, unenforced sodomy laws were taken off the books. A government shouldn’t actually need to sanction marriage at all, but does so because of a compelling legal interest in keeping track of families. Public marriage ceremonies started because private marriages proved to be unworkable. A man would marry a woman to go to bed with her then marry other women. Making the ceremony public meant that everyone in the community would know the man was taken. The same thing goes for a wedding ring. That symbol of love stuff is new. The ring is really about making sure the guy signals his presence as a husband to other women.

Even our system of registering married couples mostly helps with determining financial obligations. Even then, marriages are not contracts and the obligations usually have to be negotiated during and after a marriage. Gay couples could actually do a better job spelling out legal obligations instead of going by social convention. Of all the things that are equal with same-sex couples, there is one significant difference. Having a child is always a matter of decision. More than anything, gay marriage is about normalization of abnormal behavior. Two average people of the same gender don’t have sexual relationships.

Back to my earlier point, I don’t think attitudes have really changed much. In the days of slavery, the government made Blacks an underclass. Americans who just recently came from class-structured societies, accepted the fact that Africans were a servile underclass who needed something to do and somewhere to be watched. When the government decided otherwise, people understood Blacks were citizens. The poor and uneducated had a harder time, not because they were racist, but because the poor and uneducated Blacks were now competing with them for food and money.

In the past, people were not exposed to the concept of homosexuality. They may have known about vaguely creepy people who didn’t socialize like they did. Sometimes that led to intimidation and violence. Again, the government made sure that if someone were gay, they could be arrested for it. Eventually, the law changed and people chose their level of engagement with gay people. There are some women who gravitate to gay men, for example. Then again, the “gay community” is a loose collection of lifestyles, including those who are bisexual, dress as another gender, try to live as another gender or some combination of the above. And if you think that gay marriage is it and there won’t be suits for plural marriage wedding cakes, look at the example for civil unions.


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  1. I know more about human sexuality than I really should. One of the subjects that fascinates me is the fluid sexuality of people who identify as gay. To be fair, this can also apply to straight people as well. I think that a movie like “Chasing Amy” probably covers the territory pretty well.

    Being gay may not be a choice, but it’s not a straight jacket, either. People have a lot of fetishes out there, it doesn’t mean they can’t have a non-enhanced experience. The worst part is that I have to make dumb points like this because I’m told these slogans as arguments. So, I choose to counter them.

    Comment by 1539days — April 5, 2015 @ 6:09 pm

  2. Assuming absence of abuse or predation, I don’t care with whom someone sleeps. What really bothers me is the tyranny o the minority. Where do blacks, homosexuals, Muslims, atheists, and all the other whiners in America come off dictating one’s business obligations, etc.?

    Comment by Mary — April 5, 2015 @ 11:39 pm

    • Being attracted to the same sex may not be a choice. The person you sleep with is a choice. I’m not a life coach so I don’t care who someone sleeps with. However, I don’t like bullies and that’s what the gay mafia is about now. It’s not shaming because the target has nothing to be ashamed of. This is old fashioned vigilantism where one person is judge and jury and the public is the executioner.

      Comment by 1539days — April 6, 2015 @ 1:48 am

      • Well put, 15.

        Comment by Mary — April 6, 2015 @ 11:24 pm

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